Thank you Ina May Gaskin for including the Sphincter Law in your Guide to Childbirth because it was this that I thought of at this moment and which probably saved me a lot of pain. (yeah – that part I edited.)
“The baby is coming.” I calmly shared with my panic-stricken EMT.
“We’ll be at the hospital soon. Just hold on. Don’t push.” He said.
Yeah right. Again if you have given birth vaginally, especially naturally, you will identify this statement as ludicrous because the human body cannot control the natural mechanism known as ejection reflex. I did not even really understand it yet although I was about to.
Another contraction hit as they lifted me into the ambulance and the baby began to crown. Again I told them the baby was coming and again they said to hold on. I think my next thought was something helpful like “Idiots.” I hope I only though that…
The doors to the ambulance closed and they made Steve get in the passengers seat. Suddenly I felt the strangest and most wonderful sensation I have ever felt. It was like all the power in the universe was being pulled into a swirling ball at the top of my belly. Time slowed down to a crawl… sound was muffled and soft like coming from a far distance… the sun had not risen over the trees just yet so the light was still soft. No sooner had I noticed all this when time sped up suddenly and I managed to get out “He’s coming!” (Remember, I was having a boy because I said so.)
They put the ambulance in drive.
Whoosh!
“He’s here!”
Slam the ambulance back in park.
“What?!” came from four mouths and directions.
Yes, in one contraction my baby was born. No pushing. No head first, then shoulders, etc.
It was 7:10am. Just over 2 ½ hours from when I was sure I was in labor.
I could not get the seat belts off fast enough as I pulled at the sheets. One EMT grabbed my baby and told us we had a girl.
What?! Lemme see that.
He began to towel her off really roughly. I kept fighting my clothes and the stupid gurney and sheets and telling him to give her to me. I knew getting her skin to skin was the best way to calm and warm her but he wouldn’t give her to me. Jerk.
Finally he handed her to me. At this time my mom and son’s sweet face popped up in the windows of the ambulance and I yelled “It’s a girl!” Steve is still in the passenger seat, twisting around trying to see his daughter.
Eventually we hit the road. As we turned onto the highway heading west to the hospital, I could see the sunrise just over the eastern horizon. It was so beautiful.
Once at the hospital we were both checked out and fine.
It is interesting to my how this, my quickest labor and easiest birth, when typed out is my longest birth story. Someday I will post my other stories. Right now my fingers are tired and I have a big girl I need to go love on and cuddle with while she is still small enough to let me!
Friday, October 31, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
More of the Story
Here is the second installment of the story I began about my youngest daughter’s birth. I tried to edit it but seriously how can a mother edit one of the best days of her life that is still so vivid it could have happened this morning?! So read on with the warning that this may be a serious dose of TMI!
Jump forward a week and I am now officially beyond tired of being pregnant. I was over my kidney stone and ready to give birth. On Oct. 27th there was a full Harvest moon and an eclipse so I figured the astronomy was in my favor. Steve was out with friends so I took the kids out for Taco Bell (mine covered in Fire sauce) after walking around the mall for a couple of hours. Plus a storm was moving in. I had my bases covered. It had to happen.
And it did!
Around 1:10am I woke up to a decent contraction. I called my mom and we decided to wait it out so she did not have to make the drive for another no-show. I got in the shower to see if they would stop. They were much less when I got out so I called my mom and told her to go back to sleep. At 4:30am I woke up to another good contraction. Hmmm… this might be it! I called my mom again and she hit the road. I waited until 5:00 before I woke up Steve so he could get ready. I was afraid to jinx it! I waited a while longer and then called my doula to give her the heads up.
The contractions were really smooth and consistent and I felt great. Steve was anxious to get going but I was not feeling ready to go to the hospital yet. My mom arrived right around 6:30am. The plan was for her to stay with the kids while we went to the hospital but once she got there I wanted her with me. The contractions were stronger at this time but still bearable as long as I was in a good position. We decided to go to the hospital but only after we called my cousin over so that my mom could meet us at the hospital in about a half hour.
Once in our van I realized we might have waited too long. A huge contraction hit as we were backing down the driveway. It was completely different from any I had felt to this point. I grabbed Steve and yelled “STOP!” Baby was coming and was coming now! I had to get back in the house. All I could think of what if my water broke in my new van with leather seats.
The van was too close to the car in our driveway for me to get out so Steve came and actually tilted the van enough for me to get out. It was one of those crazy, adrenaline moments I guess. I was so impressed!
Steve called 911 on his cell while my mom helped me get back into the house. All I was thinking was to get to my kitchen (off my carpet and hardwood floors), and what I needed my mom to get for the birth. I am not the neat freak in typical situations but apparently in birth I am. All my doula and midwife assistant training I suppose.
Meanwhile the 911 operator was asking Steve a bunch of questions but all I heard was
“Yes, she knows the baby is coming.”
“Yes, she is sure.”
“No they are coming really fast… maybe every 30-60 seconds or so”
“No, this in our third baby.”
“She knows what she is talking about here. She is a professional doula”
How cute!
Around this time my son came downstairs. Very calmly I explained between contractions that the baby was coming really soon so the paramedics are coming to help and that he needed to stay on the couch and out of the way. He curled up on the couch, looking over the arm watching me. So cute! Another time I will go into how we prepared our kids for the births of their siblings but he knew what was going on and why.
Then my water broke. It was not clear so I became a little worried. Steve told the 911 operator who did not seem to understand what meconium is. Great.
We live a few blocks from the firehouse and could hear the sirens but my contractions were coming and I was not sure they would make it. All I wanted was their oxygen tanks – the rest I could do on my own!
The paramedics arrived and were nearly frantic about getting me off my hands-and-knees on my kitchen floor and onto the gurney. From my perspective the gurney was about 4 feet off the floor and I had a human trying to exit my body – were they serious? At this point I decided to ignore the paramedics.
Several minutes and contractions passed when the only female paramedic suggested lowering the gurney. I liked her. Until she asked me to get on my back.
Now I do not know if either of you reading this have ever given birth naturally but in most cases moving at this stage in labor, and especially getting on your back, is ridiculous if not impossible. I tried so hard to convince them to leave me alone but frankly I was a little preoccupied and they were sure they could get me to the hospital. I relented and worked my way onto their stupid gurney but on my side. In my mind’s eye I imagine I looked like Cleopatra with seatbelts… go with it.
Keep in mind by now it is about 7:00am so all of my neighbors and up, getting their morning paper, starting their day… except today when they were greeted by a fire truck and ambulance with lights blazing and a moaning neighbor being wheeled across her driveway. This was my thought as another contraction hit and I felt my baby move waaaay down.
Oh. My. Gosh.
Well I am going to leave you hanging again because this is already really long but also because I am a brat like that.
Jump forward a week and I am now officially beyond tired of being pregnant. I was over my kidney stone and ready to give birth. On Oct. 27th there was a full Harvest moon and an eclipse so I figured the astronomy was in my favor. Steve was out with friends so I took the kids out for Taco Bell (mine covered in Fire sauce) after walking around the mall for a couple of hours. Plus a storm was moving in. I had my bases covered. It had to happen.
And it did!
Around 1:10am I woke up to a decent contraction. I called my mom and we decided to wait it out so she did not have to make the drive for another no-show. I got in the shower to see if they would stop. They were much less when I got out so I called my mom and told her to go back to sleep. At 4:30am I woke up to another good contraction. Hmmm… this might be it! I called my mom again and she hit the road. I waited until 5:00 before I woke up Steve so he could get ready. I was afraid to jinx it! I waited a while longer and then called my doula to give her the heads up.
The contractions were really smooth and consistent and I felt great. Steve was anxious to get going but I was not feeling ready to go to the hospital yet. My mom arrived right around 6:30am. The plan was for her to stay with the kids while we went to the hospital but once she got there I wanted her with me. The contractions were stronger at this time but still bearable as long as I was in a good position. We decided to go to the hospital but only after we called my cousin over so that my mom could meet us at the hospital in about a half hour.
Once in our van I realized we might have waited too long. A huge contraction hit as we were backing down the driveway. It was completely different from any I had felt to this point. I grabbed Steve and yelled “STOP!” Baby was coming and was coming now! I had to get back in the house. All I could think of what if my water broke in my new van with leather seats.
The van was too close to the car in our driveway for me to get out so Steve came and actually tilted the van enough for me to get out. It was one of those crazy, adrenaline moments I guess. I was so impressed!
Steve called 911 on his cell while my mom helped me get back into the house. All I was thinking was to get to my kitchen (off my carpet and hardwood floors), and what I needed my mom to get for the birth. I am not the neat freak in typical situations but apparently in birth I am. All my doula and midwife assistant training I suppose.
Meanwhile the 911 operator was asking Steve a bunch of questions but all I heard was
“Yes, she knows the baby is coming.”
“Yes, she is sure.”
“No they are coming really fast… maybe every 30-60 seconds or so”
“No, this in our third baby.”
“She knows what she is talking about here. She is a professional doula”
How cute!
Around this time my son came downstairs. Very calmly I explained between contractions that the baby was coming really soon so the paramedics are coming to help and that he needed to stay on the couch and out of the way. He curled up on the couch, looking over the arm watching me. So cute! Another time I will go into how we prepared our kids for the births of their siblings but he knew what was going on and why.
Then my water broke. It was not clear so I became a little worried. Steve told the 911 operator who did not seem to understand what meconium is. Great.
We live a few blocks from the firehouse and could hear the sirens but my contractions were coming and I was not sure they would make it. All I wanted was their oxygen tanks – the rest I could do on my own!
The paramedics arrived and were nearly frantic about getting me off my hands-and-knees on my kitchen floor and onto the gurney. From my perspective the gurney was about 4 feet off the floor and I had a human trying to exit my body – were they serious? At this point I decided to ignore the paramedics.
Several minutes and contractions passed when the only female paramedic suggested lowering the gurney. I liked her. Until she asked me to get on my back.
Now I do not know if either of you reading this have ever given birth naturally but in most cases moving at this stage in labor, and especially getting on your back, is ridiculous if not impossible. I tried so hard to convince them to leave me alone but frankly I was a little preoccupied and they were sure they could get me to the hospital. I relented and worked my way onto their stupid gurney but on my side. In my mind’s eye I imagine I looked like Cleopatra with seatbelts… go with it.
Keep in mind by now it is about 7:00am so all of my neighbors and up, getting their morning paper, starting their day… except today when they were greeted by a fire truck and ambulance with lights blazing and a moaning neighbor being wheeled across her driveway. This was my thought as another contraction hit and I felt my baby move waaaay down.
Oh. My. Gosh.
Well I am going to leave you hanging again because this is already really long but also because I am a brat like that.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Memories...
Well my prayers and pleads did not stop the clock so in just a few short hours my baby will turn 4. * sob weep moan *
OK. Now that I think I have most of that out of my system for, oh, say the next 20 minutes.
No!
Well….
So the next day I took a test in the bathroom of Target. Pathetic I know, but I could not wait until I got home. Almost immediately two lines showed up and I began to laugh out loud. I am not sure what the other women in the bathroom thought about that, but my 15 month old daughter looked at me like I was crazy.
The next day was Valentine’s Day. Steve, the kids and I were walking in an event I had organized to raise awareness on cesarean sections and VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). Before we left the house I gave Steve a cute Valentine’s Day card. Then I gave him this one…
OK. Now that I think I have most of that out of my system for, oh, say the next 20 minutes.
My mind is wandering back to what I was doing 4 years ago today. It is a terrific story really (not that I am biased or anything) so grab a cup of tea and settle in for a heart-warming and wonderfully weaved tale of the strength of the human spirit and a mother’s love.
Alright, alright. Maybe that is over stating things a little. Still I hope you read on.
It all started a couple days before Valentine’s Day in 2004 when I was complaining to a friend on the phone about how tired I had felt lately. She asked if I might be pregnant.
What?
Alright, alright. Maybe that is over stating things a little. Still I hope you read on.
It all started a couple days before Valentine’s Day in 2004 when I was complaining to a friend on the phone about how tired I had felt lately. She asked if I might be pregnant.
What?
No!
Well….
So the next day I took a test in the bathroom of Target. Pathetic I know, but I could not wait until I got home. Almost immediately two lines showed up and I began to laugh out loud. I am not sure what the other women in the bathroom thought about that, but my 15 month old daughter looked at me like I was crazy.
The next day was Valentine’s Day. Steve, the kids and I were walking in an event I had organized to raise awareness on cesarean sections and VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). Before we left the house I gave Steve a cute Valentine’s Day card. Then I gave him this one…
He was stunned. Even Z who was almost 4 at this time wondered what was going on. We had just begun discussing if we would add to our family. Steve instantly said he thought it would be another girl. As the day went on he got more used to this surprise blessing and the planning began!
My due date was October 21, 2004. It was a Thursday and because my other two children were born on Saturdays I just figured my baby would be born on Saturday as well. Ah, the joy of blissful delusion. On that that note I also thought I was having a boy. No, we did not find out during the ultrasound, but I had a strong feeling. OK, I’ll be honest. I actually felt we were having a girl but I really wanted another boy so I just stuck with that because we all know the mother’s desire is what determines the sex, right. No?
The afternoon of my due date I took my 4 and almost 2 year old to Sonic for lunch. On the drive I began to feel some contractions. I had felt many Braxton hicks contractions throughout this pregnancy and these were different. Instead of eating there, we got our lunch to go and headed home. On the way I called my doula, just to give her the heads up, and my mom, so she could make the 3 hour trip to our house. Oh and of course I called Steve! I think…
As the afternoon progressed so did my contractions. By mid evening I was having a lot of back pain and could not get comfortable, so we headed to the hospital. Long story short the pain became excruciating, I was not behaving very lady like, and was ready for this kid to COME OUT!
But I was only 1 cm dilated!!!
What?!
So we waited another hour while I continued with my aforementioned behaviors and still no change. And to make matters even more perfect – the contractions were not registering on the monitor so they wanted to kick me out. Around this time I remember asking Steve to get me another c-section because I could not keep going. My other two labors were nothing like this and I was scared. Then it occurred to somebody (probably me) that the pain was not going away in-between contractions and was localized in my right lower back. To be honest it felt like a large piece of rebar was stabbing me through the kidney.
Through all of this my doctor seemed so unconcerned with this. Something about the screams from the next room being a lady having a baby or something. Whatever. I WAS IN PAIN! Fix me!
Eventually I got a shot of morphine. They must have thought this was going to shut me up and get me out. No. It just gave me enough relief that I could talk and tell them exactly why I was not leaving. After another shot and a few labs they figured I probably had a kidney infection and I begrudgingly left with antibiotics and pain pills but no baby.
:(
Side note – it turned out to be a kidney stone and yes it is worse than childbirth.
This us already very long so tune in next time for the conclusion of this amazing tale of the ages.
My due date was October 21, 2004. It was a Thursday and because my other two children were born on Saturdays I just figured my baby would be born on Saturday as well. Ah, the joy of blissful delusion. On that that note I also thought I was having a boy. No, we did not find out during the ultrasound, but I had a strong feeling. OK, I’ll be honest. I actually felt we were having a girl but I really wanted another boy so I just stuck with that because we all know the mother’s desire is what determines the sex, right. No?
The afternoon of my due date I took my 4 and almost 2 year old to Sonic for lunch. On the drive I began to feel some contractions. I had felt many Braxton hicks contractions throughout this pregnancy and these were different. Instead of eating there, we got our lunch to go and headed home. On the way I called my doula, just to give her the heads up, and my mom, so she could make the 3 hour trip to our house. Oh and of course I called Steve! I think…
As the afternoon progressed so did my contractions. By mid evening I was having a lot of back pain and could not get comfortable, so we headed to the hospital. Long story short the pain became excruciating, I was not behaving very lady like, and was ready for this kid to COME OUT!
But I was only 1 cm dilated!!!
What?!
So we waited another hour while I continued with my aforementioned behaviors and still no change. And to make matters even more perfect – the contractions were not registering on the monitor so they wanted to kick me out. Around this time I remember asking Steve to get me another c-section because I could not keep going. My other two labors were nothing like this and I was scared. Then it occurred to somebody (probably me) that the pain was not going away in-between contractions and was localized in my right lower back. To be honest it felt like a large piece of rebar was stabbing me through the kidney.
Through all of this my doctor seemed so unconcerned with this. Something about the screams from the next room being a lady having a baby or something. Whatever. I WAS IN PAIN! Fix me!
Eventually I got a shot of morphine. They must have thought this was going to shut me up and get me out. No. It just gave me enough relief that I could talk and tell them exactly why I was not leaving. After another shot and a few labs they figured I probably had a kidney infection and I begrudgingly left with antibiotics and pain pills but no baby.
:(
Side note – it turned out to be a kidney stone and yes it is worse than childbirth.
This us already very long so tune in next time for the conclusion of this amazing tale of the ages.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
A Walking Contradiction
OK so just mere days ago I was wishing time would speed up. Now I want to take it back. Please oh please Lord make time stop! Or at least slow down. A lot.
Why this sudden change of heart?
My sweet baby is turning 4 on Tuesday. That is not "baby" anymore. Not even toddler. That is, well, ... girl! I am not ready to have big kids! All of my denial over this fact is being spent pretending her older brother and sister are not 8 and almost 6 and in 3rd grade and Kindergarten. Oh why do they have to grow up?
To make matters worse my darling baby has hit the "FOURS." Some kids hit the terrible twos, for others it is the terrible threes. She did not have either. It has been almost four years of mostly easy-going bliss. Now she has this attitude and my-oh-my what an attitude she has. This switch has been very sudden and just drives home the fact that she is growing up and I do not have a baby anymore. *tear* Pray for me! And my poor hubby who has a snotty 4-year-old and an emotional wreck of a wife.
Why this sudden change of heart?
My sweet baby is turning 4 on Tuesday. That is not "baby" anymore. Not even toddler. That is, well, ... girl! I am not ready to have big kids! All of my denial over this fact is being spent pretending her older brother and sister are not 8 and almost 6 and in 3rd grade and Kindergarten. Oh why do they have to grow up?
To make matters worse my darling baby has hit the "FOURS." Some kids hit the terrible twos, for others it is the terrible threes. She did not have either. It has been almost four years of mostly easy-going bliss. Now she has this attitude and my-oh-my what an attitude she has. This switch has been very sudden and just drives home the fact that she is growing up and I do not have a baby anymore. *tear* Pray for me! And my poor hubby who has a snotty 4-year-old and an emotional wreck of a wife.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Is it Nov. 4th yet?
I do not mean to complain even though I know I am but seriously can Nov. 4th get here any slower? I am tired of the constant commercials of the candidates, the issues, the amendments, and the non-stop commentary over every thing they say or do. It comes down to one thing - you cannot believe a word of it as truth. Everything is a spin. Even the things I hear that I like I know are a spin and need to be taken with a grain of salt (whatever that means).
Even more then all that I am at my limit with all the bickering and obsessing over these four individual's personal lives. Not the big stuff that matters mind you, their character should be examined very carefully. For example, the thing I think that pushed me over the edge was the hoopla over Sarah Palin's Newsweek cover photo. Yes I know that is weeks ago and off the radar but I am behind in my blogging so bear with me. Some people complained it was unflattering because it showed she has crows feet. For crying out loud she has 5 children! I would love to look as "bad" as they said she looks and I only have 3 kinds and I am not in the very stressful arena of politics.
All I can say is thank you Mr. Tivo for allowing me to record anything I may possibly want to watch so I can skip though the commercials. Nov. 5th you cannot come fast enough.
Even more then all that I am at my limit with all the bickering and obsessing over these four individual's personal lives. Not the big stuff that matters mind you, their character should be examined very carefully. For example, the thing I think that pushed me over the edge was the hoopla over Sarah Palin's Newsweek cover photo. Yes I know that is weeks ago and off the radar but I am behind in my blogging so bear with me. Some people complained it was unflattering because it showed she has crows feet. For crying out loud she has 5 children! I would love to look as "bad" as they said she looks and I only have 3 kinds and I am not in the very stressful arena of politics.
All I can say is thank you Mr. Tivo for allowing me to record anything I may possibly want to watch so I can skip though the commercials. Nov. 5th you cannot come fast enough.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Clouds
It is a little known fact about me but I am a total weather bug. I should have been a meteorologist. Coulda woulda shoulda.
Anyway...
Today's clouds have me all excited! They looked so strange and threatening. It has been raining on and off today and the mountains beyond the foothill west of Boulder seem to have been swallowed by The Nothing. I took this picture this afternoon:
(disclaimer: these were taken on my camera phone so do not expect high quality!)
Pretty incredible isn't it?! Funny thing is that we got only a tiny rainstorm from this cloud and the parking lot we were in was actually quite sunny! At about 11 o'clock you can even see some blue sky pointing through! You gotta love Colorado and its schizophrenic weather. From fog to sun to rain to sun to wind to who-knows-what! That is just today and it is only 5pm!
Now it is all cloudy and cold looking outside so I think I am going to make some hot cocoa!
Yum!
Oh, here are a couple other great cloud pictures I took a while ago for all you closet-weather-lovers out there!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
A Beautiful Day
Hmmm... Christmas Card?
No E is not pulling up her pants. She was walking with her hands on her hips in a huff. Heaven help me. 
In my opinion there is nothing better than a lovely autumn day with my family and my camera. Sunday I got to spend the entire day with my family up in the mountains looking at the changing leaves.
I cannot remember a year when the aspens were so explosive with color! The golds, reds, and oranges just took my breath away! Sure it was a little rainy but that did not stop us from running around and celebrating how creative our God is!
Go God!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
New Favorite
Having a bad day? This site is sure to cheer you up. I was definitely ROFL! I have seen a few of these pictures and captions in emails before but there are hundreds more! Enjoy!
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